Healing

My nails are growing again

Im not happy yet

But Ive lost the habit of tearing myself apart because of it

My body is healing

It wont be the same

But Ive started to love the history it has and holds

Im growing, slowly, up towards the sun

Lets hope a drought is not going to come

Because for now

Look at me

Taylor

Spark

I don’t want love

I just want to feel and see sparks

Like a faulty cable

Sparks flying between out lips and teeth

And intertwined tongues

I know I’ll end up getting electrocuted or burnt

But for now I will enjoy the fireworks

And the bonfire will come later

I want to have my heart forget its rhythm

Legs not know how to walk without wobbling

Stomach bubbling and fluttering

I will enjoy the blood rushing to my cheeks

I don’t give a fuck about the consequences

Light the firework

Plug in the cord

Let the sky be lit up

In lust

Not love

Taylor

love/pain

I wasn’t made for loving

Just for a bit of fun

I wont ask for your support

because that would just be dumb

Because I’m not worth the pain to love

My love isn’t worth the pain

you’ll be put through

Lets just leave it at friends

Because you can’t deal with my brain

Its missing a screw…

or two.

Taylor

Pain

The scars on my wrists

remind me of this

intense feeling of pain.

Not the blood rushing out

nor the blade of my skin.

But the darkness,

the pain,

the pain within.

Taylor

As someone who still carries scars from their past, they are a reminder of where I was, compared to where I am now. They show me the darkness and pain that I felt, and although sad to have to carry it with me, its a positive reminder of where I came from, and where I don’t want to go again.